Light-bearer 3/4

[mangacat201]

Author: Mangacat(201)
Pairing/Characters: Sam, Dean, Lucifer
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 2335

Disclaimer: Of course they belong to the Krip of all people… sheesh. And yeah, that money trail passes me by so thoroughly…

Warnings: SPOILER for season FOUR, post 4.22 Lucifer Rising.
 

A/N: Yep, there we go with the second to last part OMGOSH. I'm working on the last part as we speak.

 previous part

 

They stopped again in front of a restaurant with a big flashy neon sign above the door that said ‘Mo’s Diner’ and when Sam opened the door, he didn’t pick him up, but instead slid out of the car and held out his hand for him to take. He scrambled out of the car, took Sam’s hand and followed him to the door of the diner. He had to reach up high to grasp Sam’s hand when he was walking tall and he looked up all the way from their clasped fingers to Sam’s broad shoulders and knew if he waited, he would be as tall someday, even if Sam was stooping right now to accommodate him and the other people. Dean had secured a booth at the window for them, looking up at the toll of the bell. When they stood in front of the table, he looked hesitant for a second, but then patted the seat beside him. Sam grasped his other hand and swung him up so that he could settle beside Dean before the tall man folded himself into the opposite seat. He watched as Dean called out to a woman in a hideously lime green dress who in turn bustled over to give them laminated cards and set down shiny white cups in front of the two men. Then she asked what the little one would like to have and Dean ordered a hot chocolate. He felt a bit miffed to be overruled just like that especially since she came over a few moments later to fill the cups in front of Sam and Dean with a hot dark liquid that had an interesting smell, bitter and sharp.

 

Just when he was about to glare at Dean for denying him such a taste, the woman came over again and set down a cup in front of him. The smell that wafted out of this one made his nose twitch from the heady aroma of sugary sweetness and cocoa. He bent over the rim of the cup to catch more of the heavenly scent, when a hand lay down heavy on the back of his neck and dragged him up a few inches before his nose could touch the hot drink.

“Hey there, sport, be careful, or you’ll burn your nose. You’re supposed to stir it first, like that, and then drink it.”

Dean’s amused voice pulled him from his reverie and suddenly the hand was hot and heavy against his skin when they both realized that this was the first instant the other man had touched him. In a moment of silence nobody moved, but then after he blinked once, Dean let his hand slide a way in a gesture that was almost casual and made a move to sip from his own cup. He frowned a little, but soon he was drawn back to the delightful smell. He picked up the spoon and stirred the light brown liquid until a little swirl formed almost to the bottom of the cup before he sampled a bit on the spoon and let it drip back into the cup only to do it all over again. He felt them watching him and glanced around through lowered lashes, but neither of the man said anything, so he continued his play with the chocolate until he finally mustered up the courage to stick the spoon in his mouth and taste. It turned out to taste even better than it smelled and his eyes widened at the flavour that exploded in his mouth like a little firework. He could make out Sam and Dean sharing a look and a smirk out of the corner of his eyes, but he didn’t pay any attention to it, savouring the sweet aroma on his tongue.

“That good, eh?” He nodded mutely at Dean, who continued, “then what would you like to eat?”

He looked at the menu that Dean shoved over to him and the letters rearranged themselves in front of his eyes to words and short sentences, but he really had no clue what to make of them. After he had stared at the plastic covered paper for some time, trying to find something he would want for his first meal, he felt his cheeks grow hot like little flames where licking at his skin, when Dean spoke up again.

“Hey, I totally forgot, can you even read?”

He glared at the other man with the most ferocious expression his four-year-old face could muster and turned his nose up.

“I’m not even hungry anymore.”

He heard Sam stifle a snort and Dean gaped at him as if he had said something unbelievable. Considering that his traitorous stomach chose that very moment to growl loudly again that might very well have been the truth. The man shook his head and threw a little smile at Sam before turning back with a sombre expression.

“Well, then we’ll just stuff ourselves on our own, right, Sammy?” and he addressed the waitress he had winked over. “I don’t know what Sam’s having, but I would like some scrambled eggs, a side of bacon, hash browns and a very big slice of pie.”

“Sure thing, hun, will be ready right away,” She turned to take Sam’s order before looking at him expectantly, “And what will the little one here have?”

“He hasn’t decided yet,” Dean said.

She nodded and smiled at him, but he wasn’t in the mood to smile back this time. Instead, he opted for going back to discovering his hot chocolate and took a few tentative sips after he found out that the cup wasn’t as hot anymore. The food didn’t take long to arrive and soon delicious fumes trailed in the air all over their table and made his mouth water and his nose twitch. He watched as Sam and Dean tucked into their meals with gusto, while a lonesome plate with some fruity dough thingy stood next to Dean’s elbow seemingly unattended. Now that he saw them eating, the gnawing at his belly seemed to grow tenfold and he wished he had just picked something from somewhere on the card, consequences be damned. He watched Dean finish his plate faster than Sam and drag the second one to himself. He couldn’t help but track Dean’s every move from scooping up a hearty morsel on his fork to stuff it into his mouth and make obscene sounds alongside. On the second bite, Dean paused with his fork halfway up to the mouth and looked at him.

“You want some pie?”

He was half-tempted to refuse, but he was suddenly really, really hungry, so he shook his head yes and Dean offered him the fork. He looked at for half a second, but when the smell or sugar and sunshine hit his nose again, he couldn’t hold back any longer. He opened his mouth and when the bite-sized morsel was placed in his mouth, he closed his lips around it, but let the fork slide out silently.

 

If the hot chocolate had been good this was much, much better. The fruity juice spilled over his tongue and the dry dough crackled against his teeth. He chewed slowly and reverently longing to drag out the tasty experience, but he had to swallow after a few moments. He noticed Dean regarding him with avid eyes and a broad smirk on his face, but he couldn’t do anything but stare back in wonderment.

“I see you are partial to the very best thing humanity has to offer, right? Want some more?”

He nodded rapidly and Dean pushed the plate over the table top until it right before him. His eyes flickered between the plate and Dean’s face, half expecting the other man to snatch it back immediately. After all, he couldn’t want to let go of something that tasted so amazing, now could he? But Dean only waggled his eyebrows and indicated for him to start. Tentatively, he shoved the fork into the sugary mount and brought it back to his mouth and over and over again. Dean just smiled at him and reached out to ruffle his hair with a pat on the head. Then he didn’t notice much more since the pie demand all his immediate attention.

When he was finished, Dean paid again and they left the diner with the bell sounding on the door to tell them goodbye.

 

This time, however, Sam got behind the wheel of the car and Dean slid into the passenger seat beside him after he had settled in the middle. He watched them share a look and then Dean huddled down into his jacket, closed his eyes and leaned his head against the side window. He listened to his breath evening out while Sam stirred the car out on the main road and then out of town easily. He felt content watching the scenery fly by for a bit of time. He tried watching the sun again as well, but the longer he spent in Sam’s and Dean’s presence and in human form, the more he got attuned to their moods and feelings and the more it confused him. Silent contemplation seemed to be the only way to sort through it all, but as he tried to untangle the machination of either man and their bond, it got more and more complicated and he didn’t understand even a little bit more. The only thing he was able to determine was that whatever the world or fate or even they themselves threw at them, they would never let go of each other, body, mind and soul. He was thrown by such a bond that would persevere even if everything else lay in tatters since he had never encountered something like it before. He felt a deep longing for such a connection, but also to know how it came to pass. When he emerged out of his thoughts with a little sigh, he found Dean still fast asleep against the window and Sam holding the wheel steady, his eyes on the road.

“Can I ask you something?”

He felt Sam’s wary eyes on him for a moment before the man turned back to the road and nodded.

“How are you and Dean so close?”

He noticed how Sam choked a little and his hands gripped the wheel tighter.

“We are brothers. And there’s no one else left of our family now… but even before, we never had much to go on but each other, so I guess we are closer than normal siblings would be, not that it did any good either way.”

He took in the dejected expression on Sam’s face and the bitterness that seeped into his words and frowned in confusion. He had brothers and sisters, but none of them had ever shared a connection quite like this. He knew that Sam was hurting alongside Dean and tried to make things better, just as Dean was upset that he could live up to his own space in Sam’s life. What he couldn’t figure out though, was the reason and he felt terribly lost trying to muddle through it all. There was this gap, this black void that made Dean’s soul bleed and Sam’s strength falter. He tried to puzzle it together to a question, but what came out was only half of it and didn’t leave him satisfied. That however would be forgotten over Sam’s answer in a moment.

“Why? Why is Dean so broken?”

He was startled when Sam flinched as if he’d been hit by a low blow. The other man only whispered one word.

“Hell.”

The word echoed in his mind and rung through the black void like a bell, opening the floodgates to what was buried deep inside the blackness. His breath hitched as he looked upon the deepest, darkest corners of the pit. And felt it answer to the call. He recoiled in terror and blinked to lay his eyes on Sam again, felt his breath leave his lungs in quick sharp bursts and his fingers shake as he clawed at Sam’s elbow.

“What… what is that?” his voice shook and he didn’t care that Sam looked at him with wide, disbelieving eyes.

“The opposite of Heaven, as they say; a prison made of bone and flesh and blood and fear.”

“The op… but… who would do something like that?”

“Well, you apparently. That’s what we’re told at least.”

A deep welling ache settled low inside his belly and rose up to press against his lungs, constrict his breathing like an iron vice that lay around his torso.

“Me? But I… I didn’t…I…”

He met Sam’s eyes for a moment, when the other man cursed and pulled over to bring the car to an abrupt halt on the gravely shoulder of the road. He was dragged against a hard and strong chest with a hand rubbing his back soothingly, but it did nothing to slow down his whirling thoughts or his gasping breath.

“No, you didn’t, we know that now, ok? Just like nothing else quite turned out like it was claimed to be. But it’s not your fault, alright?”

The unspoken ‘I hope so’ rang through and did nothing alleviate his anguish. He felt inexplicable wetness seep into the fabric beneath his face and the fast pace of his breath made him gasp for more air that wasn’t coming and the edges of his vision were greying. Suffocating panic coated his insides and the only thing that was steady in all the turmoil was Sam’s low voice rumbling at him. Slowly he got dragged with the calm rhythm of the tall man’s chest and his breath flowed more easily. Still, a terrible fatigue got a hold of him and he felt his limbs go heavy and still as his breathing evened out. The only thing he heard was Sam’s far away voice speaking ‘Dean, we need to talk… no more secrets…’ before he went under.


Ok guys, one more day left, one more part to write... I hope I'll make it *crosses fingers*

part four